A Painless Guide to Choosing Your Wedding Party

By November 13, 2017 No Comments
Three women's feet

Deciding whom you’d like to stand alongside you on your wedding day is an important decision. You already have your perfect fiancé, so now it’s time to pick the wedding party! While picking a wedding party might seem as easy as grabbing some friends, there are other factors to consider before asking, “Will you be my bridesmaid?”

This may seem like a daunting task, but with our tips, we’ll walk you through choosing your wedding party, so you can have fun celebrating your big day.

While there may be many special people in your life, you should try to limit the size of your wedding party. Too many participants will make the role lose its meaning.


Consider your wedding size.

Three women engagement

The bottom-line is there’s no set number of how many people can be at your wedding party. Despite this, you should take into consideration the overall size of your wedding. If you’re having a big wedding bash, then you can afford to put a few extra people in your wedding party. If you’re having a more intimate ceremony, then it might look a little strange having half of the guests next to you at the altar.

Include your siblings.

Whether you are super close to your brother or sister or just friendly acquaintances, invite your siblings. They are family and likely to be around for years to come. And who knows, you could become closer over the years and have them in your wedding party could be the start of it. You can also include a cousin you feel particularly close to if you don’t have any siblings.

If you come from a large family and you can’t include everyone, then set different roles aside for teenagers or children. Instead, make them involved in the ceremony by inviting them to usher, pass out programs, or other areas you need to be filled for the wedding.

Think before you ask.


After you’ve asked someone to be in your wedding party, there’s no turning back. So you need to carefully consider which friends you’d like involved rather than rushing to ask everyone. Take the time to reflect on the decision and your current friendships. Ask yourself: Will still be close or even friends with this person in five years?

Don’t be guilted into asking.

You don’t have to ask someone just because they asked you to be in their wedding. Wedding are expensive, so you don’t need to feel obligated to ask your college roommate or coworker that you haven’t seen in years. Relationships change, and while you maybe had been close five years ago, that doesn’t mean you’re still close enough to give them an important role in your wedding.

If someone wants to talk to you about why they aren’t in your wedding party, then feel free to be completely honest. Explain that it was a difficult decision to make, but you really felt like those closest to you at this point in your life should be standing next to you. While there are so many people in your life that are important—including him or her—some of the special ones were left out.

Be considerate.

Maybe you want your wedding party to include your sister who lives in Australia or a friend with a new baby. While that’s fine, you have to be considerate of their abilities. A distant friend or sibling may not be there for you through every step of the wedding process. On a similar note if one of your friends is under financial stress or super busy with their children, then they might not be to throw you an epic bachelorette party.

Choosing your wedding party.


Ultimately the decision for your wedding party is up to you and your partner. If you’re feeling particularly stressed out, then try talking about it honestly with each other. Set limits on the number of people and try to find those close to you alternative roles. No matter who you choose, the choice is yours, and you shouldn’t feel guilty about it. Your loved ones will understand your decisions, and be happy to attend your big day even if they aren’t apart of your wedding party.

Rebecca B. Lawrence

About Rebecca B. Lawrence

Rebbeca has been writing about weddings, jewelry, and fashion for years. Her favorite place to hang out, aside from this website, is Pinterest. She loves Art Deco Jewelry, beach-themed weddings, and anything related to the British Royal Family.